


Cousin Sluggy

by TheGhostCalamity



Series: Sluggy Series [39]
Category: Cousin Sluggy, SpongeBob SquarePants (Cartoon)
Genre: Age Play, Age Regression/De-Aging, Betrayal, Diapers, Fire, I've been waiting to do something like this for years, Original Character(s), Political Asylum, Pyromania, Scat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:33:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28260207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGhostCalamity/pseuds/TheGhostCalamity
Summary: Spongebob and Patrick have to take care of Patrick's supposed cousin for a few days.
Series: Sluggy Series [39]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1543084
Comments: 1





	Cousin Sluggy

One day Spongebob was working at his new restaurant called Spongebob's Place. He took over after him and Squidward took Mr. Krabs to court for all of the crap that he's done over the years. Krabs was arrested, and the two of them, as well as Pearl settled with millions of dollars. Squidward doesn't work there anymore and actually became a successful jazz musician, being bigger than that Squidward puppet. Everyone seemed real happy. Spongebob even got more workers to work at that place and was following all the guidelines for his workers and managing the place, unlike Krabs. Planktoneven got the secret formula Krabs stole from him years ago.

Patrick then came in for dinner.

"Good Evening, Spongy Crew! I would like 3 Spongy Patties, A Large Kelp Shake, A Large Coral Fry, and a Mermaidman and BarnacleBoy Toy, please.", Patrick said as he entered and ordered his food.

Patrick then sat and waited for his food. He saw they were playing some pretty great shows on the TVs there, so he watched some Cowboy Bebop, South Park and AVGN. Then his food came a little while after that, and he ate all of it, happy that the whole meal was 99.9% cheaper than a single Krabby Patty was when it was the Krusty Krab. To tell the truth, Patrick was actually there because he had to ask Spongebob something, so he waited for him to get off work and close up shop.

A couple hours later, it was time to close and Patrick went over to Spongebob. He was ready to ask his favor.

"Hey Spongebob, there's this little thingy thing I need help with tomorrow, and possibly a couple more days. My supposed cousin is coming over for the holidays since he doesn't have anywhere else to go. I was wondering if you could help me out. He's part Canadian, part Japanese.", Patrick asked Spongebob.

"Of course, I don't really have anything planned for the holidays, so I can help. When are you supposed to meet him?", Spongebob said.

"Around 8 or 9 tomorrow. He said he already has everything planned.", Patrick said.

They both parted ways and got a very good night sleep. They then met up to go meet this new relative near Shady Shoals.  
The man that is worshipped by this whole account will be here any second.

Then it happens. He finally shows up. A big orange man with a hairstyle similar to the Heat Miser, a goatee, and nothing but a diaper with safety pin showed up. 

"Hoo deez peepuh? Swuggy happee too meet yoo!", the orange guy said.

"Are you my relative I'm supposed to meet with?" Patrick asked.

"OH, yoo Patchwick, and yoo Spungebwob! I'm Cousin Sluggy! See, Swuggy want be babee. Swuggy's birthday today! Swuggy have wots of munee, so we can do wutevuh Swuggy wants!", Sluggy said and yelled at the same time.

"Where do you wanna go? We are free the whole day." Spongebob said.

"Swuggy want go too arcade, moovie, and peetsuh. Swuggy wuv peetsuh!" Sluggy said.

They then went to the movies.

"Swuggy want too see vis wun!" Sluggy yelled as he pointed at the poster for the new Stuffy Bear movie. 

"Alright, Sluggy, let's go watch this movie! What are we doing again?" Patrick said. 

But Sluggy did something a little unexpected. He made a huge Krabby Patty, Meat on the bone, Rotten asshole of a roadkill skunk, Akihiko's Protein, Mr. and Mrs. Tenorman Chili, Tonio's Mozzarella Tomatoes, Bell Peppers and Beef, Smile Burger filled dump in his diaper. The diaper also held a Kelp Shake, Staminan X, Rolling Rock, E Tank, Abbachio pee, LeBlanc coffee piss drenched bulge. 

"Swuggy poop, now change Swuggy's dipuh!" Sluggy yelled through the cinema. 

"OK, I can change your-" but Sluggy cut Spongebob off.

"No, Swuggy want Patchwick change Swuggy's dipuh!" Sluggy yelled.

"OK, I can change you, so we won't miss the movie." Patrick reassured.

They went to the bathroom and got to changing him. Patrick took a deep breath and got to work. It seemed worse than sewage, gave a more gross vibe than anything. He then wiped him, powdered him, and put a new diaper on him. He then thought of Rash from Battletoads wearing a diaper, and Zitz telling him to burn it. Patrick took the diaper outside, and lit it on fire with special Spongebob logic fire. It was gone.

They then watched the movie. Sluggy loved it a lot, but nobody else seemed to enjoy it. It was a bigger bomb than Oogieloves. They were finally done, and Spongebob and Patrick look like they got done watching crush porn, but were happy Sluggybhad fun.

They then went to the arcade, that movie was actually a 8 hour marathon for some reason and now it's 6 pm. It turned dark already because it was daylight savings time. 

"Swuggy want play vis games!" as he stood by Time Crisis 2 and Silent Scope EX.

Ge then proposed a quarter or two into the games and played them. He seemed to enjoy shooting people a little too much. Spongebob and Patrick went to go play some Daytona USA.

After a couple hours of that, they called it quits and went home.

"Swuggy tired, can Swuggy go too bed?" Sluggy asked.

"Sure, you can go to sleep at my house. Everything you need is there." Patrick said.

Sluggy then went down to Patrick's Rock and seemed to be getting ready for bed. Meanwhile, Spongebob ordered pizza and wings for him and Patrick.

But Sluggy wasn't asleep. He got up, opened the rock to make sure Spongebob and Patrick were inside. He got some supplies to do something that will change the way you see everything.

"Swuggy wedy too give Spungebwob and Patchwick vewwy big suhpwize!" Sluggy yelled while looking at the audience.

What's Sluggy gonna burn down? A. Ares B. The 5th Island Warehouse C. Spongebob's House or D. An Amiga CD32?

He then went outside and planted his stuff onto the ground. He went into Spongebob's house through the back, put some things in the bathroom and made sure no one saw him. The pizza guy was a block away. Sluggy slashed his tires and his before he saw him. Patrick saw the delivery boy stuck. He went over to go help him replace his tires. Sluggy went back to the bathroom window and threw a molotov cocktail into the bathroom. He poured gasoline all over earlier and put a note on the kitchen counter framing Patrick.

"Swuggy wedy too hav gwilled Pineappuh!: he yelled as Spongebob's house ignited on fire as it was snowing.

"Gary, we gotta get outta here!" Spongebob yelled as he picked up Gary and got the note and went to the door.

"Swuggy mudda Cheeokee, Neeshkee, Chef, Spiche, and Seezuh!" Sluggy yelled, supposedly killing Chiaki, Nishiki, Chef, Spike and Caesar. But it was actually Junko, Jing, Vicious, Wamuu and that mountain lion.

"Swuggy pooped willee bad!!"

He mumbled tons more nonsense as the pineapple died in front of his eyes, and flames replaced his irises.

But thankfully, Patrick helped the guy and Spongebob and Gary got out safely with no injuries. But his house burnt to the ground and was gone.

"Patrick Star, what do you have to say about this!" Spongebob yelled as he showed Patrick that note. It said "I burn down house. -Patrick"

"No, it wasn't me! I swear!" Patrick yelled.

"He's telling the truth, he was out here helping me replace my tire. I also saw some big orange dude over there with a molotov. That's probably what happened." The pizza guy told them his testimony.

They saw Sluggy outside and approached him. They had a lot to yell at him for. 

"Yes, Swuggy bun down howse!" he yelled. He then took off his poopy diaper and smeared all his poop all over his entire body and started running.

"We gotta get him! Patrick, leave the food!" Spongebob demanded.

They chased Sluggy through the snow and reached downtown Bikini Bottom. Nat Peterson, Harold and Fred threw up from the poop smell and seeing poopy Sluggy. They eventually reached Spongebob's Place.

"Nowun can get Swuggy!" Sluggy yelled. But Patrick jumped in front of him and punched him, knocking Sluggy to the ground.

The police were already there and arrested Sluggy. He was taken away pretty quickly as Spongebob and Patrick ate the pizza and wings.

TWO HOURS LATER

Spongebob and Patrick are at the Bikini Bottom Asylum. Sluggy is locked away in a max security cell with nothing but a straitjacket and a diaper. He immediately starts crying. 

"Guys, I'm afraid Sluggy has been deemed criminally insane. He'll be staying here for a long time." the warden told them.

"Well, how long is his sentence? And will he be able to interact with others?" Spongebob asked.

"Yes, he can interact with others via Zoom. His sentence is permanent. We can't have a guy running around burning houses down. He actually ignited 10 other houses, 3 Five Below locations, and an In and Out. And he'll be fed whenever he wants, get changed when he needs to, and be on suicide watch." the dude told them.

"Wait, Swuggy want go Swuggy bye-bye!" Sluggy yelled as he saw them leaving.

"No, you gotta stay here!" Spongebob yelled at him.

"Why can't Swuggy go Swuggy bye-bye!?"

"Because you've been a naughty baby and burned down Spongebob's house. You can go Swuggy poopy, Swuggy ninight, but NO MORE SLUGGY BYE-BYE FOR YOU!" Patrick told him

Sluggy immediately started bawling his eyes out, and they just left.

Spongebob, Patrick, and Gary left and walked down to Patrick's house. 

"Spongebob, after all of Sluggy's nonsense, I gotta confess. I feel bad for everything I did. Like when I did a bad job babysitting Gary, embarassed you in front of my fake parents, read your diary along with Squidward, didn't help with Junior, and even got you sent to the back of the class and get a good noodle star taken away when I drew that Big Fat Meanie picture. I'm so sorry best friend!" Patrick cried.

They just went to sleep immediately after this horrific night when they got to Patrick's house. Them, everyone in Bikini Bottom, South Park, Kamurocho, Hope's Peak, Inaba, and pretty much everywhere had so much coming for them.

Sluggy just sits in his cell muttering "NO MO SWUGGY BYE-BYE" over and over.

TO BE CONTINUED IN "THE END OF COUSINSLUGGY"


End file.
